All Quiet on the Poo Front

Over the past week baby girl has been, shall we say, a little plugged up.  As in, she went three days without having a poopy.  (How embarrassing this would be if she could understand!)  This started Poop Watch 2012, with us looking for any signs of bowel movement, frequent texts from work (Has she done it yet?), and copious amounts of praise for even the slightest passing of gas (Good job Ells!  Have anything else in there?!).  On day two we took her to her pediatrician.  He sent us off with some reassurances and a prescription for some suppositories, with instructions to use them only if she went five days without some movement.  Five days!  Thank goodness day three brought some relief (for all of us :)).  I have never been so happy to see something so disgusting.  While the whole ordeal was cause for concern, I found it amusing to think that for three days our lives revolved around waiting for our baby to poop.  It made me think of how different (wonderfully so) our lives have become.

Bedtime is REALLY early.

If we are not at least getting ready for bed by 9:00, and by "we" I mean me and Erik, Elliot is long asleep by then, it is basically like the middle of the night for us.  We had the opportunity to catch a movie a few weekends ago and we both found it ghastly that a movie would start at 7:35!  We happily headed to the 4:00 show knowing we would be tucked safely into bed by 9:30 at the latest.

There is no such thing as a last minute, quick trip to Target.

Just the other night we were reminiscing about the days when, if we wanted to go somewhere, we would just get in the car and go.  No need to plan the whole day around a trip to the library.  No need to wait until someone wakes up from a nap.  No second guessing the amount of food or diapers necessary to make it to a second location when running errands.  (If I feed her right before we go, will I have enough time to make it to the grocery store AND the post office?  No, better not risk it.)

We voluntarily make fools of ourselves on a daily basis.

There is nothing we wouldn't do to get one of those huge, gummy smiles from our little silly.  On any given evening you could walk in our house and see me doing a dance while blowing raspberries, prompting Elliot to erupt into giggles or Erik walking around the house with Elliot on his head saying "have you seen Elliot anywhere?"  I have even found myself at work just randomly blowing raspberries at, say, the copy machine, because I am so used to doing it at home. 

My body is different now (and I don't care).

Here I sit, two pounds away from my pre-baby weight.  The only thing is, it doesn't look like my pre-baby body.  It is just different.  God bless those lucky women who bounce right back to their bikini-wearing bodies.  I kissed mine good-bye when the stretch marks settled in for the long haul.  I thought I would obsess over it.  To my surprise, I don't have time to obsess over it.  Working full-time, I have very little time to be with my daughter, and every second I have with her is precious.  How could I waste it worrying about how I look?  Plus, my body just did an amazing thing.  Who am I to judge how it looks after pulling off such a feat?

Waking up at 6:30 on a Saturday is less like a punishment and more like an opportunity.

It doesn't matter if Elliot wakes up or not, without an alarm I am now programmed to wake up at 6:30.  If she is awake, great!  That means we get some good mommy/daughter time in.  If not, then I get an early jump on the day.  It is so satisfying to have eaten breakfast, showered, cleaned up the house, fed the baby, and look at the clock and see it is not even 10:00 yet.

My husband is amazing.

Ok, so I knew this before the babes came along.  But post-Elliot, I have seen even more facets of his personality and I fall in love with him more every day.  It's not just that he has really stepped it up in the  helping out around the house department.  (Seriously, I am super lucky.  Since he gets home before me at night he usually has dinner going by the time I get home.  Then, later he lets me have some good, quality time with Elliot and he cleans everything up.  That's right, cooks AND cleans!)  It's the way being a dad brings out parts of him I did not know existed.  He is so careful and loving with her.  Today, he was sitting with her on the floor and she was sitting up by herself in her wobbly way.  She looked up at me with a huge smile on her face, so proud.  But when I glanced at Erik he was looking intently at her, with his hands close to her but not touching, waiting for the slightest sign that she might topple over.  Elliot, of course, was oblivious, plowing forward without the slightest regard for her safety.  There was something about that scene that just tugged at my heartstrings.  I don't know if it was the way he didn't look up because he was too worried about her falling or that he so obviously wanted her to feel the joy she was feeling about being so independent, but it melted me.

Anyway, these are just some thoughts on how our lives have changed over the past 5 months.  That's right, it has been five whole months already.  It is so much better than I thought it would be.  I am one lucky lady.  A lucky lady that has spent way too much time away from her family writing this blog post!  So on that note, I will bid you adieu.  Happy Veteran's Day weekend!

Fall Photo Shoot

 

 

It was another successful photo shoot with my cousin, Amy!  We just received our photo CD in the mail today and I couldn't wait to get them up on the bloggo.

 

Girlfriend was in such a good mood on the day of the shoot and I think it shows.  She can really work the camera.  I predict orange tutus are going to be big this season ;). Hey, I grew her, so I have earned the right to shamelessly plug her cuteness.

 

But, seriously, thank you to Amy for doing such a good job.  Without further ado, I present Ms. Elliot rocking fall:

 

 

She even let her parents get in on some of the action:

 

Happy Fall everyone!



Don't quit your day job.

It has been approximately a month and a half since I have been back to work since little miss Elliot came along.  And, I have got to say, I don't love it.  I never thought in a million years I would want to be a stay at home mom.  But, as it turns out, it is currently the deepest desire of my little heart.

To be fair, the job I came back to was not exactly the job I left.  For those of you who don't know, I am a public defense attorney for an Indian tribe.  While I was on maternity leave, my boss decided to take a new job and her job has not been filled.  So, when I returned, I was asked to be the program manager until someone else can be hired.  You might be saying, "But, Jessica, you are your own boss now, that sounds awesome!"  No.  Because not only has my workload doubled without another attorney in the office, but being in charge of three other employees comes with an endless parade of BS.  On top of that, my commute is an hour each way.  This really cuts into cuddle time with the babes.

I am not trying to sound ungrateful.  I know in this economy just having a job is an accomplishment.  And I really am flattered that my employer feels I am able to run the Public Defender's Office.  But, at what point do you go from doing any job to looking for the job you really want?  When I was in law school I never imagined I would be practicing criminal law.  Public defense can be brutal, soul-crushing work.  Sometimes, even when you win you feel like you lose.  It is true what they say, you either get into criminal defense for life or for a short time, there is no in-between.  I am not a lifer.

So, blogosphere, I guess I am coming to you for advice.  I don't really know what I want.  If I took the plunge to become a stay at home mom I am not even sure I would be happy with that decision.  Not to mention, who would pay all those school loans!?  I wish I could go back in time and tell that dumbass (me) who is taking out all those loans with abandon that really I am signing my name to the dotted line of not having the option to stay at home with my future babies.  I know women have struggled with these decisions for decades, but it is something you never truly understand until you are experiencing it.

On the plus side, my working so hard and Erik getting his first nursing job (this is the first time we have had two incomes!!) allows us a little wiggle room to spoil Ells a little.  For example, may I introduce the luxury high chair:

The finest Target has to offer :).  Girlfriend loves it.  She likes to sit at the table like a big girl.

So, I am one uncertain Mama when it comes to work.  But there is one thing I am absolutely certain about:  I am blessed with the most amazing family, and no matter what happens at work I always have that :).

I walked in on this adorable scene the other day and had to run and grab my camera:

These two are the best!

Miss Independent

One of the weirdest things about being a mom is having two completely opposite instincts at war with each other all the time. The first is wanting your child to be healthy and thriving.  The second is the desire for your child to remain tiny and in her current stage forever.

Our little monkey is four months (almost) going on 14.  She is getting so big and has started really interacting with us in the last couple of weeks.  And she is becoming very independent, both to my relief and sadness.  Where she used to want me to rock and cuddle her into a nice cozy nap, now she cries when she's sleepy in my arms, preferring that I put her in her crib to allow her to fall asleep on her own.  She has perfected the art of self-soothing (a big-time thumb/finger sucker) and loves her alone time.  This is great, on one hand, because it allows me more time to get other things done.  But I can't help but acknowledging that this is one step in many towards the inevitable: she is going to grow up and leave us!  I know it is a long way off still, but seriously, my pregnancy was over in the blink of an eye and it feels like she was just born even though it has been 4(!) months already!

So, in an effort to hang onto every minute, and as my Facebook friends can attest, I have attempted to document EVERYTHING she does in pictures and video.  Here is a very small sampling of what she has been up to lately:

 Ballet dancing

 Big girl bath time

 Dressing like a pumpkin before bedtime...not to be confused with a carrot!

Sitting up like a big girl.

This picture melts my heart.  It perfectly captures how big and little she is at the same time.

As far as baby's go, we really feel like we have hit the jackpot.  We would love her no matter what, but she has turned out to be a super chill baby.  We would have been happy with a tenth of her temperament.  She rarely cries and when she does it is usually easy to sooth.  She goes to bed at the same time every day and always sleeps all through the night.  She is a good little eater.  She is just a very happy camper.  Sometimes she has so much joy bubbling over she doesn't know what to do with it and will let out one ear piercing, adult-sized scream.  At first we were concerned because we thought something was wrong with her, but when we would look she would be smiling ear to ear.  I will leave you with this little video, which perfectly encapsulates her personality.  Warning: it is like two full minutes of the same thing, so watch at your own risk.  However, if this doesn't make you smile you have a heart of stone :).

So long, farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, adieu

Aunt Danielle is leaving!

 For just a little over a month my sister has been in town and staying with us.  Later this evening she has to go back to Boston to complete her last semester of grad school :(.  We are all quite sad.  It has been so nice for Elliot to have a chance to bond with her Auntie.  Those two are like peas and carrots.  Who else will buy her red baby jeggings, share celebrity gossip with her, and listen to how awful her parents were treating her?  Only a cool aunt!  And I'm not gonna lie, it has been great for us to have another adult in the house to help out with baby duties.  I don't know what we are going to do without her.  We simply must have a live-in nanny!  

Since saying good-bye is hard, I think we'll just send her off with a picture tribute:

Loving on Auntie and Ginger

What's up too cool?

Keeping it shady

Being silly

My absolute favorite picture of these two.  

Good luck with your last semester Auntie!  We will miss you!

Summa Summa Summertime

In addition to raising a baby this summer I have also been raising something else I am almost as proud of...my garden!

This is the before and after of part of the garden.  My dad planted it while I was still pregnant and named the little garden shown "Elliot's Garden."  There is a little sign and everything.  Anyway, the garden really took off and I have spent the last several weeks harvesting zucchini, green beans, cucumbers, jalapenos, and tomatoes.  And even though I have spent a lot of time on the Food Network and Pinterest trying to find recipes to use up all the zucchini, I have quite enjoyed my daily trips out to the garden.  I also attribute some of my weight loss (46 pounds since delivery!) to having tons of fresh produce around.  So in the spirit of keeping summer alive here is the recipe I use for homemade tomato soup.  I found it online a few years ago and just wrote it down, so unfortunately I cannot give its author due credit.  But, it is fantastic and if you have tomatoes on hand I definitely recommend it.  I used cherry tomatoes this last time and was able to eliminate the sugar all together because they are so naturally sweet.  Also, the cayenne pepper gives it a bit of a kick so if you are not into some spice I would only use half the amount suggested.

Fresh Tomato Soup

• 8 cups chopped fresh tomatoes
• 1 sliced onion
• 1 garlic clove
• 4 cups broth (any flavor)
• 3 tablespoons butter
• 3 tablespoons flour
• 1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
• 1 tablespoon basil
• 1 teaspoon thyme
• 1 bay leaf
• sugar to taste
• 1/2 cup milk (optional)

Combine tomatoes, onion, garlic, cayenne, basil, thyme, & bay leaf with broth in stock pot.  Bring to boil and gently boil for 20 minutes.  Remove from heat and discard bay leaf.  Run mixture through a strainer, reserving the liquid.  Place remaining chunks in blender and blend until smooth.  In the stock pot, melt butter over medium heat.  Stir in flour to make a roux, cooking until it is a medium brown.  Gradually whisk in a little tomato mixture so no lumps form.  Stir in the rest.  Season with sugar.  Add milk if desired.

Oh, and I also discovered a way to use up my cucumbers and some other things.  My new favorite thing is infused water!  There are several different ways to make it and the combinations are limited only by your imagination, but this is how I do it: fill a pitcher with ice; add the desired fresh produce; fill with water and give it all a stir.  Let sit at least 15 minutes in the fridge and then serve.  I call it party water!  It is a great way to keep drinking water when you get bored with it and want to reach for a frosty diet coke.  My favorite combinations are cucumber and lemon, nectarine and mint, and cucumber and mint.  Try it, you won't regret it :).  Happy hydration!

Time waits for no man...

...or in this case, woman.

Well, the time that I have been dreading and that seemed so far in the future that it would never occur is upon us: my return to work.  I am sad and anxious, and also worried that I will be gone so much she will not like me the best anymore.  I am assured by all that she will always love her Mommy the most, but I am convinced she is going to feel abandoned.  In actuality I know it will be harder on me than it is on her and that makes me feel better...a little.

The last 12 weeks have been the best of my life and I am going to cherish this summer forever.  It was truly a wonderful experience to spend every morning waking up to her cries (even when I was so tired I could cry!) and then spend the day with her and usually with Erik, our new little family figuring each other out.  And while I am sad to see time slip away so quickly, I realize it was necessary to take our bambina from this little bundle...

...to this big girl.

I am so excited to keep watching her grow!  I will be spending the next couple of days enjoying every minute of our time together.  Say a little prayer for us on Thursday!