A Month in Review

It is always my goal to update the blog at least twice per month.  I think there has been only one month in the history of the Rammelsberg Fammelsberg I have made my goal.  What can I say?  I'm a busy lady.  We have been up to a lot in the last month, so I thought it was about time.  I will address this Christmas card style because I don't often give updates on the whole family, usually just the new things Elliot is doing.  Elliot fans, don't worry, it will be mostly about her.

Jessica & Erik

Erik is still working two jobs, both part-time.  He mostly works at Kennewick General Hospital as the Clinical Systems Educator (combining his nursing skills with his nerd computer skills), and then once a week he works at an eye surgery center to keep up his practical skills.  He has been having a very busy couple of months because his "part-time" KGH job has become more of a full-time job as they have just implemented a new computer program.  I think it will start to settle down soon and he will be back to his normal schedule.

I am still working 3/4 time as a prosecutor and LOVING it!  Seriously, if you ever have the opportunity to work 3/4 time take it.  Due to some scheduling changes, this weekend I had Friday off AND will have this Monday off as well...4 day weekend!  It could not have come at a better time.  This week was rough.  One of the children on my caseload took his own life, which is, sadly, much more common than it should be among foster children.  Obviously, I spent a lot of time going over and over his file, trying to figure out what could have been done differently...sad and unpleasant.  On top of that, a defendant, upset at my recommendations, threw a table in the court room (I should probably get some pepper spray or something) and a woman came into my office, angry that the defendant in her case did not show up for trial (as if I have anything to do with that) and told me that I have "an awfully big job for such a little girl."  So, yes, I earned this long weekend, and the large glass of wine I had with dinner last night ;).  Here's to getting rested and refreshed before next week!

Toast

Interestingly, there is a lot to report about Toast this month!  In the space of 30 days he has gone from the world's most high-strung dog to the world's most expensive high-strung dog.

If you are Facebook friends with me, you may have noticed around 3 weeks ago he made a trip to the emergency vet.  He has been having seizures since he was a puppy, but they usually last no more than five minutes and then he is fine.  Well, on this occasion, he had been seizing for 40 minutes when he finally saw the the vet and was given some drugs to stop them.  He had to have tests run and then went to see his regular vet.  Turns out he has epilepsy and now he has to take medication every morning and evening.  High maintenance.  He hasn't had any seizures again, so it must be working.

Elliot

Girlfriend has been busy with her usual tricks.  You know, being cute, getting into everything, etc.

She is currently stepping.  I say stepping and not walking, because I think there is a distinct difference.  She will only take about 3 to 4 steps on her own.  Usually from one piece of furniture to another.  But she definitely does not walk.  She could, she is just scared.  I know because when she doesn't realize she is doing it she takes steps, but as soon as she is aware she won't do it, and reverts to crawling to get to her destination.  But, it should be anytime now!

She is also starting to get quite vocal.  She says a few words with purpose.  Her favorites are "Mom!" (occasionally Mama, but usually Mom!), "Dadda" and "Toast".  My favorite is Toast because she will look at him, point, and say "Toasssssst."  I thought Erik was going to lose it the first time she looked at him and said "Dadda."  Adorable.

She is growing like a weed.  Ten months old and she is wearing 12-18 months.  The problem is, she is so skinny the pants that are long enough for her are way too big in the waist.  Erik claims this to be the story of his life.  Must be tough.  I did discover a well kept secret to keep her in clothes: yard sales.  I picked up like 10 new pairs of jammies for her today for $10.

Ok, well that is the update on the fam.  I will leave you with some pics :).

Easter

Girls' Day luncheons

Playing (that pointer finger is always out!)

Taking our measurements!  Probably not horribly accurate, but gives us an idea.

Reading

Practicing walking

Relaxing

And being generally adorable.

9

A couple days ago, Girlfriend turned 9 months old.  That means she has now been living out of the uterus longer than she was in it.  That means everyone I know who became pregnant while I was pregnant has definitely had their babies.  That means she is one pregnancy old.  It's funny how waiting 9 months for her to get here took FOREVER, yet the 9 months since have flown by.  I don't know why, but for some reason I've always looked at 9 months as a milestone.  As the months went by and she turned 1 month, and then 6 months, and so on, I would think to myself, "well, she's still a little baby, it's not like she's 9 months yet."  And, suddenly, it was upon us.  I also thought I would maybe not like her as much.  Obviously I knew I would still love her, but I thought by 9 months she would have grown out of being a baby and would be more like a child, and the newness would have worn off a little.  Do I sound like a first-time mom or what?!  How opposite it turned out to be!  She is more fun now then she has ever been!  Every time she gets a little older I think "Ok, this is my favorite stage."  But then she grows a little more and does even more and I think "Wait, no, THIS is my favorite stage." And worrying about the newness wearing off?  Preposterous! Every single day there is something new for me to marvel over.  She has such a personality.  She is very friendly and likes to meet new people.  She is much braver than her mama in that respect!  And I am always amazed that even though she cannot talk, she has found ways to communicate exactly what she wants.  I just love her.

I finally uploaded (and when I say "I" I mean Erik) my photos from my phone, which is what I take most pictures on, so this is going to be a bit of a photo dump.  But here is what our little 9-month-old has been up to:

 Height: Can't remember the exact number, but it was 99th percentile according to her 9-month well child exam.

Weight: Again, can't remember the number.  Something like 18 lbs 8 oz?  57th percentile though.  (Hmm, tall and skinny, who does that resemble?  I wish I could say it was me!)

Favorite mode of transportation: crawling really fast

Least favorite mode of transportation: car seat, sometimes

Walking status: Almost!  She stands by herself for short periods of time, but no steps.

Favorite foods: rice, peaches, pears, peas, green beans, ravioli, egg yolk, yogurt, wagon wheels, bananas with mixed berries

Least favorite foods: any fruit or vegetable mommy tries to make herself, apricots, beef in gravy

Favorite activities: swinging, dancing, singing, blabbering, pinching (not ok), reading, playing, going on walks, being outside.

Least favorite activities: going to the doctor, having her diaper changed, having her nose wiped, getting dressed.

 

Being with Mommy. #girlsdayisbetterthananyotherday

Getting into mischief. #mommytoobusylookingatfacebook

Eating her eggs. #loveatfirstyolk

Playing guitar with Daddy. #borntostrum

Chillin' like she owns the place. #targetismysecondhome

Swinging is the best! #playgroundofdreams

Opening cards. #somanyadmirerssolittletime

Helping Mommy make cookies. #notactuallyagoodideaforbabies

Playing in my high chair. #idowhatiwant

Reading my favorite book with Daddy before bed. #goodnightlittlemonkey

Busy trying to figure out how to get in my old car seat. #sillygenius

What they don't tell you...

I have come to understand that parenting is a learning process.  I like to think I was well-informed going into this, that I did my due diligence.  I read the books, the baby blogs, the magazines, etc.  I asked my ob/gyn every question and solicited advice from all the mamas I know.  Even after all that preparation, there are still some things that come up that take me completely by surprise.  And I'm not talking about the corny, expected, "I can't believe how much I love her!" kind of things.  I am talking about basic, common sense things that it seems like all of my pre-mama research should have uncovered.  So, just in case there are any soon-to-be mamas out there reading this blog, this one's for you!

Your hair will be a complete disaster.

Ok, so here's what I knew going in:  when you are pregnant your body does not produce some kind of hormone that usually causes your hair to fall out when it gets old.  Apparently, we are all losing hair all the time in small amounts and we replace it as it falls out, so it is not noticeable.  After you give birth your body starts producing that hormone again and you lose a ton of hair.  Like I said, this I knew and was prepared for.

What I didn't know was this:  It all starts growing back at the same time.  I know this should have been the logical conclusion to come to when you find out it all falls out at once.  Why is this a disaster?  Because around 6 months after the big fall-out you start to notice little fly-aways frame your entire face.  And they stick straight up, and they are noticeable.  Mine are so bad that when I went to my new hair stylist she asked me if I recently had a baby.  No worries, in a few months I will have extremely thin, weird bangs :(.

Your biggest critic?

Other moms.  You thought I was going to say "yourself" right?  That is what I would have said before, too.  But it is true.  Instead of being a community of support and acceptance like we should be, everyone is eyeing each other and saying "oh my gosh, that poor child!"  I try not to let this get to me too much.  I know my daughter is healthy and happy and that it could be far worse.  What bothers me the most is how every parenting philosophy is so intensely inflexible.  Their method is right and there is no merit to any other style and if you are not following theirs you must not love your child.  I have read the blogs and articles, and maybe it is just the lawyer in me, but I usually end up wanting to take out my red pen, circle the offending information (usually something like "you should be feeding your child liver in place of rice cereal") and write "citation needed."

So this is a plea to the mamas out there: parenting is hard enough without us being hard on each other.  Let's support instead of judge.  I will (try to) not judge you for breastfeeding your child until she is 4 if you will overlook the fact that I give mine baby food from a jar.

The floor is your nemesis.

Your kid is going to spend a lot of time on the floor.  A lot.

This means you are going to become a floor-cleaning fanatic.  And sometimes there is just not going to be enough time to do a thorough cleaning job.  We have mostly hardwood floors throughout the house. I confess, they only get swept and mopped once a week.  Sometimes when Friday rolls around again and I sweep up the floor during Elliot's first nap I feel like I should maybe call CPS on myself.  It doesn't help that we have a sheddy dog.  Sure, it's adorable when they play, but I can't help but thinking with every wag of that tail approximately 20 hairs are flying into the air and coming to rest on something my baby will inevitably put in her mouth.  Sometimes it helps to just have a glass of wine and try not to think about it.

See?  Adorable.

It shines a spotlight on the weakest parts of your marriage.

This is not necessarily a bad thing. Although, I can totally see how marriages that may have been on the verge of collapse pre-baby probably could not withstand baby time.  I say it is not necessarily a bad thing though because for a strong, healthy marriage (which I am blessed to have) it makes you aware of the areas you need to focus on.  Sleep deprivation combined with stretched resources and way less time to focus on each other puts stress on anyone.

On the other hand, it also allows you to see the side of your spouse you didn't know existed and makes you love them even more.  May I present exhibit A and B?

A

B

Even post-baby, he still stands there in the neon looking like a high I want to be on.  (This is not the first time I have referred to Blake Shelton lyrics in the history of this blog, and it won't be my last!)

Ok, I think I am spent.  I hope this helps someone out there!

I will leave with a couple more pics of my cutie patootie because if I don't brag on her, who will?

Sitting cross-legged.  She did this herself.

Forgive the paleness and red, baggy eyes.  We are recovering from a cold :).

Mommy Confessions

I started my new job last week, and so far I am loving how busy I am and that I get to be home more with Babykins.  Since I am mainly working in the juvenile court, a lot of my case load is made up of dependencies, which is the legal process in which children are declared wards of the court for various reasons, usually for abuse or neglect.  These are the hardest cases to handle in my job.  There are some really REALLY bad things that people do to kids.  But, let's not talk about that here.

At least working with all these sad cases I have decided to be a little less hard on myself.  I know from my blog/facebook posts it appears that everything is great all the time.  And in truth, we are very happy.  But that doesn't mean we don't have our share of issues.  So in the spirit of letting it all hang out (well not ALL) these are my confessions:

1.  I have given Elliot formula.  No one died.  I will do it again.

2.  Even though I complain about how I would love to be a stay at home mom I am not sure I could do it full-time.  Some days I am happy to be going off to work.  My mother is a saint.  Not only does she watch Elliot every day all day, but she stayed home with my sister and me.

3.  Sometimes I go to the bathroom just so I can have a break.  (I was relieved to read in Tina Fey's book Bossypants that she does the same thing.  In fact, the whole section on parenthood in that book is very relatable and I highly recommend it to mommies.)

4. I eat Elliot's snacks...a lot.  Food products made for babies are delicious!  I especially enjoy the yogurt melts.  I have also been known to finish off her jars of baby food, but only the fruit ones. 

5. I often look for any excuse at all to go to Fred Meyer just because I like being there with Elliot.  

6.  I honestly don't know if I would love her as much if she were a boy.  Isn't that awful?  But, for whatever reason, I just can't picture loving any other baby, boy or girl, as much as I love her.

7.  I give her juice and I don't feel guilty about it.  (Some of you are saying "Wait, what's wrong with giving a baby juice?"  Exactly!  But it is a thing and right now apparently it is not kosh to give babies juice.  Sugar or some nonsense.)  Sometimes I don't even water it down.

8.  Ok, this one is embarrassing and probably my worst mommy moment to date.  So a couple months ago, you know, when she was about 6 months old, I noticed there was something kind of gunky looking in the sucker part of my breast pump and I thought "hmm, I wonder what that is?"  Upon closer inspection I realized, to my horror, it was old milk/bacteria and I was trying to figure out how to clean it out, not realizing that whole part of the pump came apart.  I had been using it for approximately six months without ever having cleaned it properly!

9.  I considered making my own baby food...for about 3 minutes.

10.  I am an introvert, which means when I get home from work the last thing I want to do is go anywhere except to my jammies, on the couch, with my babe-o.  It's how I refuel.  You know what's the best excuse for an introvert to stay in her comfort zone?  A baby.  And, believe me, I cash in on that card ALL. THE. TIME.

So, there you have it.  Now you know the real me.  It feels good to get all that off my chest!

Since it's been a while, I will send you off with some stats:

Age: (almost) 8 months

Teeth: 6 (4 top, 2 bottom)

Favorite foods: mango, peas, oatmeal with bananas and mixed berries, scrambled egg yolk, green beans, sweet potatoes and chicken, ham pineapple apple and rice, and pretty much anything combined with pears

Least favorite foods: avocado, apricots, apples (stay away from "a" foods I guess!)

Words spoken: "Hi!" "Boo" (She is just now starting to be talkative.  For a while she was just kind of silent and sneaky.)

Favorite activities: swinging, strolling, singing, pulling herself up and balancing "hands free", bouncing on Daddy

Least favorite activity: getting dressed

"Whatever you are, be a good one." -Abraham Lincoln

I had a law professor who always put quotes up to start each class.  Most of them were in one ear and out the other, but for some reason this one stuck.  Maybe it is the simple elegance, my interpretation being that it doesn't matter what you are as long as you are honest and competent.  I think I also liked that it doesn't limit you to being any one thing.  It suggests that you can wear lots of different hats but that you should wear each one well.  He was not my favorite professor, nor my least favorite, but he was a good teacher and he taught me virtually everything I know about criminal law and procedure.  Little did I know at the time how important that would be, since, as I have mentioned before, I never guessed I would end up being a criminal defense attorney.  Sadly, I found out last week my professor passed away.  He was in his forties.

So, where am I going with this?  Well, I guess I have been thinking a lot about my career lately and, if you have followed my blog in the past, you know that I really struggle with working full-time and wanting to be home more with Elliot.  I also had an epiphany that I have been looking at my job all wrong.  I keep telling myself that this is the "in-between" job, that being in criminal law is just something to do until I get my dream job, that this is definitely not my career... I have decided to stop doing that.  If recent events have taught me anything, it is that life is short.  Too short to tell myself that this life I am living, the career side, is not really my life.  I have decided to embrace it and take change as it comes.  I am a criminal defense attorney, and I hope I can say I am a good one.

But, here's the big news, ba ba ba bum (that's a drum roll): I will not be a defense attorney for much longer.  After Thanksgiving I applied to be the Assistant Prosecutor at the Yakama Nation.  It was a last minute decision to apply and based on some kind of crazy things going on with my current job, which I won't delve into :).  Just before Christmas they offered me the job.  I didn't immediately accept because I was comfortable where I was.  However, the deciding factor came when I met with the boss to negotiate terms and I asked if I could come on part time, working 30 hours per week, and allowing me to stay home with Elliot an extra day plus a few more hours every week.  She agreed.  It was basically a done deal for me at that point because this was the best possible solution.  I could continue to work, to keep my skills sharp, and to be home more with babykins!  So I am excited to report I will be starting there on the 22nd.  Wish me luck!

Speaking of people who are good ones, babykins is 7 months today!  Here are some pics to keep you from being totally bored:

Pertinent stats:
Teeth count: 3 (2 bottom, 1 top)
Favorite foods: boob milk, bananas, pears and oatmeal, prunes, sweet potato puffs, mixed veggies, green beans
Least favorite foods: apples (weird, right?), banana yogurt, broccoli and carrots with cheese
Favorite mode of transportation: laundry basket
Newest mode of transportation: crawling!
Number of actual words spoken: 0
Favorite activity: 3-way tie between playing, taking baths, and reading/chewing books
Number of times Mommy has been overwhelmed with love and pride: infinity